That jump from five to six…goodness it seems so big! Madeline keeps telling me, “I’m going to be this many” (holding up six fingers) “Can you believe it?!” And goodness I can’t. People have always told me to cherish every second because it goes by so fast. I always would smile like I understood, but I feel like I’m officially seeing what they mean.
I can’t believe six years ago I hadn’t even met her yet. I knew I loved her but goodness I had no idea the love I would have for her that continues to grow each and every day. It’s hard to explain the emotions. Not only her growing up but also just the feeling of how far we’ve come. Just me and her. I remember I would talk to her when she was in my tummy, and having those same conversations over the years seems like such a dream. Being a single mom has taught me so many things, SHE has taught me so many things. To giggle a lot, focus on the little things/little victories, hold tight to Jesus, escape to the world as magical as she sees it. Most of all she’s taught me what I need to be not just for myself but also for her. She’s taught me to be brave, not to worry what others are saying, to give my reputation to God, to not be afraid to live, to be that example for her.
All in all, I truly feel like Madeline saved me. What a precious gift she is! God knew what He was doing when He made me her mama. I can’t say the journey has been easy, hasn’t been scary at times. But you know what? God has proven Himself to be SO faithful to us. Here we are six years later, and His loving hand has been on me and Madeline through it all. As the years have gone on, I’ve seen Him as an ever present help and developed a relationship with Him that I find so special. And it extends to Madeline. I know that no matter what, no matter what’s in store for us, Jesus has us!
What an absolute blessing it is to be this girl’s mama. To watch her grow from my precious baby into a truly beautiful inside and out little girl. I feel like this past year she’s gone from not just being my little girl but also into my best friend. I have to remind myself sometimes that I’m not talking to an adult haha. Goodness does this girl have the biggest heart! And it shows through everything she does. More and more everyday I see her dreams of being a marine biologist someday come true. Her love for animals (all living things, really) runs deep and is so sincere. She won’t even kill a spider crawling on our bathroom floor haha and instead we have to let it go outside “so it can find it’s family” 🙂 Her heart is SO big! She loves to make others smile. She loves to draw, paint and make things for others. Her giggles and smile can light up a room. Her loud personality (and I say that with all seriousness haha) never goes unnoticed.
Six years later, I still find myself staring at her when she’s sleeping at night saying “Thank you Lord for giving her to me! Thank you for making me her mama”. She still has those kissable cheeks that I never want to go away. I love getting on her level and getting lost in the magic she sees. Her imagination is HUGE and getting to experience it is just so special. When she grabs my neck and leans up for a kiss, hugs me, grabs my hand, just letting me know she’s holding to her mama, I can’t help but beam with that feeling all over again of having her placed in my arms for the first time. I never want these days to end!
This journey of being her mama has been the most precious gift I could ever ask for. I know one day hanging out with her mama may not be the coolest thing, but I pray we will always hold the closeness and special bond we share. I squeeze her tight and never want to let go, because being her mama is truly my favorite part of life. Getting to raise her and teach her of the love of Jesus. What a privilege it is to be her mama!
You are so precious to me, my Madeline girl! Thank you for making the past six years of my life the biggest blessing I could ever ask for. I love you so much and will forever stand by your side, cheering you on! Always know how much I love you, and most of all, how much Jesus loves you. God has big plan you! I just know it. Happy 6th Birthday, my precious girl.
What a precious post! She’s so blessed to have you as her momma! I love your heart for Jesus and it shines bright! Enjoy six 💗